Why waste the critical time you have ahead of you on good enough? Whatever you choose and what direction you want to pursue is worth your full attention.
From now on, commit to yourself that it is ALL or NOTHING. That makes it a clear FUCK YES or NO. Don't waste time.
Commit to being "All In." If something is going to be on your radar, give it your full attention. No matter what it is, dive in. Don't toe the water. Don't later on question why it didn't go like you wanted. Everything should be FUCK YES or NO.
Model is 5'3" 135lb and in S